Passion

"Whatever you do, find the God-centered, Christ-exalting, Bible-saturated passion of your life and find you way to say it, and live for it, and die for it, and you will make a difference that lasts. You will not waste your life" ~ John Piper

Loving Jesus today...

Meant laying down my plans and desires for a quiet naptime to find Corey had had a dirty diaper and proceeded to put it everywhere in his bed :( Sure many kids do this kind of thing but he is 3 and he looks at me like he has no clue why it might be wrong...FASD strikes again. The craziest thing is that I know there is no real way to get through to him why he should NOT do this again. Some days not being able to find a way to reach him, causes me to want to cry if I look at many many years of this. But then I realize I have to just take today and ask God for help and not look at the big picture for once.

It's me that has to change..not him...I took this today as God's will for me and what it means to embrace suffering in just a small way. We listened to John Piper's powerful sermon called "Don't Waste Your Life" in which he talked about embracing suffering and pain and it made me think a lot about my life.

I think this past year has been a real journey for me..from being shocked by the specific pain and difficulty we were dealing with (Corey and many other things)... to trying to keep it away from my life...to realizing on many fronts I cannot escape suffering and difficulty..to maybe where I realize what it means to lay down my life, take up my cross and follow Him. Embrace suffering..that means to hug it, welcome it and say I'm willing to do what God wants me to do ...today.

Remember your numbers

It seems lately that I think a lot..too much maybe about life..where we are headed etc. Perhaps all this thinking is why my mind can't retrieve important life information when needed.

Say for example you realize in the morning that due to life "stuff" this week that you now have 27 overdue library books and $9 in fees. You try to renew as much as possible online and then actually try to figure out why you only have 26 library books in the library crate. You renew them by putting your "secret" codes in which are your library card number and the last four digits of your phone number.

Check..done. The only thing is that later that day when you go to Aldis for the first time in weeks and attempt to use your debit card to pay for groceries...you realize that that PIN number is not in your head. So you pray about it and you have a number that enters your head..you try that in the checkout lane. Only it doesn't work..because that is your last four digits of your library card!!!! So you ask them to hold your groceries while you go outside, call wonderful teen daughter, ask her to check your files and see if she can find your PIN number :) I may be having a midlife crisis or I might be a normal mom or I might be thinking too much about other things :)

Why waiting is more about endurance than patience

When I think of waiting for something, I often imagine the doctor's office...where you know your appointment time has come and gone but you wait and wait some more..looking for a magazine to read or something to fill the time. That requires patience.

But when I look at my life and the waiting that I'm doing, it isn't so much about sitting back waiting for God to work or being patient that my time is coming, as much as it feels like I'm exhausted from running the race. It must be that waiting is really about endurance because Isaiah 40:30-31 says "Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles: they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint" Waiting is exhausting not because a person does not believe in the character of God enough to know He is good, His timing is good and everything He does is good and for His glory, but rather because it takes endurance to keep running.

This week these are things that God is showing me. I thank Him for sending some friends this week..some who ran beside me for a while to keep me from focusing on the tiredness that comes from running...some who offered a cold drink and kind words to encourage me to not give up...some who said "I'm praying you can keep going". I'm glad God was so wonderful to put these verses in Scripture to remind us that waiting is hard..not just because we have to trust Him for patience but that it is like a race and He promises to give strength to those who are weary.

Be Strong in the Lord

This song has meant a lot to me in recent months. I'm so thankful for friends who stand with me and encourage me that God has a plan! Hope it brings you encouragement today too.

7 Reasons You Should Adopt in 2010

Read HERE for a great post about adoption as we begin a new year!

Goodbye 2009

Besides the year 2000 when my father went home to heaven, 2009 has been one of the most confusing, difficult years of my life so far. I know that in the midst of many trials both in ministry and our adjustment to our little guy that God was always with us...giving us just enough encouragement and hope to cling to Him and keep going. For that I am grateful.

Here are some verses that express our heart..that we know that anything we are is because of God's power, any endurance in trials is only because of His sustaining help. Praise be to Him who keeps us from despair, keeps trials from destroying us, and promises to never forsake us.


"But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed: perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the l...ife of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies" (II Corinthians 4:7-10...verses for 2009).

So goodbye 2009...thank you God for being near, for being with us and helping us stand in Your strength. I look forward to 2010 with hope for what HE will do.